h o m e . . .

📝Introduction!

welcome to my "miniblog" - the little place i keep any random thought i have! this font is one i made of my own handwriting, but i know it is unreadable. you can turn it off below if needed.

APRIL

update iii. It makes me very depressed to see religious individuals in the indie web sphere be blatantly, disgustingly queerphobic, even though I know that this is an issue in many religions, including, and especially, my own, hence why I do not often interact with the community. I recently came across a webring that banned any LGBT community members from joining as they believed being queer is a "temptation from the Devil", and... I just cannot relate to this line of thinking! I really, truly cannot parse the concept of an omnipotent, purely powerful God that can create something out of love and then refuse to love it just because it decides to express its true self. I don't think God would want anyone to suffer or hate themselves. Why create diversity amongst humanity if the True, Right way to be is uniform and strict? I just don't think there is any room for hatred or force in religion.
update ii. u know when u realize reality is real and youve been dissociating for three hundred year. Yeah
update i. oops ive abandoned neocities havent i. i just have had sooooo much going on recently. like for example im meeting my long distance girlfriend in may and lol i accidentally typod that as gay which i find incredibly funny but anyway i've been sooo excited about that but also soo nervous because every single other time ive met an online friend irl it has gone terribly and i know this is different but still. also i did shrooms and hated it. so yeah that's where i have been

MARCH

update iii. i feel more stable than i have in a while, yay
update ii. dropping out of college for the 49059045th time lol
update i. wow i forgot to make a box for march. lol. anyway it is MARCH SIX which is my moms birthday! i love her a lot, she is so important to me. a family friend brought her a cake yesterday and i got her a cat statue. i really hope she has a good birthday and is happy. also i stayed up until 5 am last night working on another twine game and now i'm so tired LOL

FEBRUARY

update v. i went and did a lot of thrifting with my family today, it was really nice. we did a mini roadtrip to a bunch of nearby cities and i got a lot of cool clothes AND I GOT TO SEE A THRIFT STORE CAT!! like it lived there. his name was secondhand sam... i love you secondhand sam....
update iv. i feel like all i do is complain about school... which sucks because i do fucking love school but it is SO stressful and i am just not able to keep up with deadlines. i'm starting to wonder if i have the ability to follow through with things or form habits or do anything at all. oh well!
update iii. i had to ask for an extension on an assignment because my meds have made my mood all whack. i'm rapidly cycling between moods and heavily dissociating. UGH!! And I have class tomorrow. UghHHH. I just wish life was easier sometimes Y'know. I just wish I wasn't quite so ill. I wish I did not struggle. I described my situation in my email to my professor as "trying to win a game of ring toss with your eyes closed on faith alone" and it Really Does Feel Like That!!
update ii. i got the ring and i got an extra piece of jewelry with it too omg. i can't figure out what the other piece is from buti am not complaining it's so cool ahhhhhhhhhh
update i. made this page because i was bored lol. also wanted to use this font i made somewhere even though it literally sucks. um what else... i bought a screen used piece of jewelry that was on crusade and worn by my favorite character... it's supposed to be coming in the mail tomorrow I'M REALLY EXCITED